XIV
Original
Literary translation
§ 14.1
— , — , .
The table, with sixteen places, no less, was laid by the maid and Mr. Planchet under the commanding gaze of the mistress of the house.
§ 14.2
.
Mr. Planchet had dined in fashionable society often enough not to seem a complete novice during the preparations.
§ 14.3
, , : « ».
Until then he had not felt particularly anxious, but he dared not think about the business of serving dinner: he knew he was not exactly “good with his hands.”
§ 14.4
, , , .
He was annoyed to learn that, since the young girl would be dining at the table, the governess too would be among the guests, to make the number even.
§ 14.5
, , , , .
To that end, the mistress of the house’s wardrobe was also pressed into service, and a black faille dress, perhaps a little loose on her, was bestowed upon young Catherine.
§ 14.6
, .
It was not until around eight o’clock that the guests began to arrive.
§ 14.7
, .
Three or four carloads brought the entire party, in open touring cars, convertibles, and limousines.
§ 14.8
.
Mr. Planchet anxiously awaited the moment when he would announce that dinner was served.
§ 14.9
, .
Behind the drawing-room door, he was like a French infantryman awaiting the signal for H-hour.
§ 14.10
, .
The slightly loose waistband of his trousers did not worry him, for sturdy suspenders held them up.
§ 14.11
, , .
But he pulled his wrists as far as he could into his sleeves, which were too short.
§ 14.12
, , .
His predecessor’s gloves were a little loose and too long.
§ 14.13
.
At the end of each finger was a little empty pocket.
§ 14.14
, , , .
At last, the maid, specially delegated by the cook, lowered the starting flag.
§ 14.15
« ! » .
Mr. Planchet opened the double doors and announced, perhaps a little too forcefully, “Madam, dinner is served!”
§ 14.16
.
But all these people were hungry and had other things on their minds than criticizing his tone of voice.
§ 14.17
, , .
The soup plates had to be brought round to the ladies first, beginning with the mistress of the house.
§ 14.18
, , .
Mr. Planchet thought that the maid, filling the plates at the sideboard, put a little too much soup in them for the comfort of a man whose white-gloved fingers were rather too long.
§ 14.19
, , , , « » .
Especially since the very first plate was refused by the ladies served first, on dietary grounds, then by poor Catherine, swathed in her black faille dress and too timid to do anything different from the others, and finally by young Olga, delighted to “get out of” eating soup thanks to the distance separating her from her elders.
§ 14.20
, .
That first wandering plate made the full circuit of the table and finally came to rest before Councillor Frapotte, seated to the right of the mistress of the house.
§ 14.21
, , , .
It was high time, for these successive refusals had ended up alarming Mr. Planchet, who wondered whether they might be due to his gloved fingers coming too close to the sloshing surface of the soup, forever struggling to stay level.
§ 14.22
, , , ; , , .
After the ordeal of the soup and the pouring of Rhine wine into tall-stemmed glasses, the head waiter saw with dread the approach of the moment when he would have to bring out the Burgundy. The splendor and immaculate cleanliness of the lace table decorations intimidated him, and he dreaded staining them with horribly conspicuous red wine, which would thwart the hostess’s plans if she wished to use the table linen again on another occasion.
§ 14.23
, , .
So, while serving fillets of sole with spinach, he felt a certain relief when he saw a guest drop a little of the green vegetables just short of his plate.
§ 14.24
, , .
There were two fish platters, one assigned to the maid and the other to Mr. Planchet.
§ 14.25
; , , , .
He had carefully planned his part, but there was a false move, almost a collision, just as they were about to serve Mr. Chalabert, the industrialist from Belfort.
§ 14.26
, , , , , , .
The maid prevailed and served Mr. Chalabert some sole, while Planchet, thrown off course and having lost the thread, wandered around the table with his platter in hand, looking for other diners who had not yet been served.
§ 14.27
, , .
All in all, apart from these minor mishaps, everything seemed to be going fairly smoothly.
§ 14.28
, , .
By the time the saddle of lamb was served, Mr. Planchet had acquired enough ease and nonchalance in his new role to allow himself to follow the conversation.
§ 14.29
, :
He was offering his platter to a lady when he heard the host say:
§ 14.30
— .
“My chauffeur has had an accident.”
§ 14.31
.
“He has just telephoned me the details.”
§ 14.32
…
“We had let him set off alone from Bront-les-Eaux…”
§ 14.33
, , , , , :
Mr. Planchet, his heart pounding, listened so intently that he forgot to withdraw his platter, and the lady, who had already taken three slices of lamb, finally said in exasperation:
§ 14.34
— , , …
“Thank you, thank you, that’s quite enough…”
§ 14.35
.
He therefore resumed his upright position behind the lady.
§ 14.36
, , , , .
But, platter in hand, he continued to follow his employer’s conversation anxiously and without moving.
§ 14.37
— , .
“Something terrible has happened to poor Célestin.
§ 14.38
.
Imagine, a murderer had slipped into the car.
§ 14.39
, , , .
He realized it in time, just as he was stopping at an inn in Chalezey, a few leagues from here.
§ 14.40
; .
They tied the fellow up and put him in a barn under the watch of the innkeeper’s daughter.
§ 14.41
.
The innkeeper and my driver went off to fetch the gendarmes.
§ 14.42
, , , .
But when the police arrived, the thug had made his escape, and no one knows what has become of the innkeeper’s daughter.
§ 14.43
…
Perhaps he killed her…”
§ 14.44
, .
Mr. Planchet glanced weakly toward Catherine and saw that his supposed victim had turned bright red and seemed to shrink into herself, her head barely rising above the table.
§ 14.45
, , , …
Then his eyes met the hostess’s, and she, surprised to find him standing motionless, gave him an impatient look and signaled him to resume serving…
§ 14.46
.
It is a mistake to tell a beginner at table service a story that hits quite so close to home.
§ 14.47
, .
From that moment on, the dish carried by Mr. Planchet bumped into a number of bare shoulders and the backs of black evening coats.
§ 14.48
.
Dark sauce spilled onto pale dresses.
§ 14.49
, .
People noticed, more or less, but no scene was made.
§ 14.50
, , , , .
A few guests, omitted from the distribution of both lamb and stains, timidly held out their empty plates and asked to be served, unaware of the dry-cleaning bills their small deprivation was sparing them.
§ 14.51
— …
“My chauffeur probably won’t be back until tomorrow…”
§ 14.52
.
This announcement by the master of the house restored a little confidence to the unfortunate serving man.
§ 14.53
, , .
He told himself he had the night ahead of him to make his escape with Catherine, under more merciful skies.
§ 14.54
, .
He was serving foie gras with port wine to a plump man in his fifties when his customer of the moment was addressed by the master of the house.
§ 14.55
— , ?
“I suppose you’ll have to deal with that affair, Commissioner?”
§ 14.56
— , , .
“I don’t think so, since Chalezey is in Haute-Saône,” said this none-too-zealous agent of public retribution.
§ 14.57
, , , , , , , .
Before the praline ice cream, which no one declined, but after the much less popular cheese, some splendid fruit was passed around. This gave the well-bred guests a chance to display their refined upbringing by deftly peeling a Duchesse pear, held on a fork, with a silver-gilt knife. Catherine, who had little practice at this complicated exercise, chose to abstain.
§ 14.58
, .
They moved into the drawing room, where the chambermaid had set out coffee and liqueurs.
§ 14.59
, .
Young Olga brought the cups to each guest according to a prescribed order of precedence.
§ 14.60
, …
She was followed by Mr. Planchet, carrying the sugar bowl…
§ 14.61
, …
Several guests had already been served when Mr. Planchet saw the chambermaid come back into the room, approach the master of the house, and whisper a few words to him…
§ 14.62
— , .
“My chauffeur has returned,” the host announced triumphantly.
§ 14.63
…
Several voices rose…
§ 14.64
— …
“Call him in…”
§ 14.65
…
“We want to see him…”
§ 14.66
!…
“He must tell us about his adventure!…”
§ 14.67
.
They were delighted to find themselves face to face with a character straight out of the crime reports.
§ 14.68
: , , , .
They had no idea how lucky they were: not one star but two, and even more interesting ones, were already under their roof.
§ 14.69
?
What was going on in Mr. Planchet’s mind at that moment?
§ 14.70
.
Probably nothing.
§ 14.71
.
Blows like that empty your mind at once and paralyze your entire motor system.
§ 14.72
.
That is the secret behind many a heroic pose.
§ 14.73
, , , , .
As soon as Célestin caught sight of his would-be murderer, standing in the middle of the room with a sugar bowl in his hand, he too was rooted to the spot.
§ 14.74
, , .
To the great surprise of those present, two wax figures stood facing one another, as lifelike as any in the Musée Grévin.
§ 14.75
, , , , .
Catherine had not moved either, but no one, not even Catherine herself, could have said where she had disappeared to.
§ 14.76
.
Only after a moment did one of the wax figures come back to life.
§ 14.77
:
Célestin found the strength to stretch out his arm toward Planchet and stammer:
§ 14.78
— …
“That’s him…”
§ 14.79
; , , …
At first no one understood; but once they did, there was a tremendous uproar…
§ 14.80
.
The women let out piercing screams.
§ 14.81
, .
Three Browning pistols, an artilleryman’s revolver, and a bunch of keys were pointed at Mr. Planchet.
§ 14.82
, , , , .
Fortunately, this half-stunned creature still had good reflexes, which made him raise his arms in the customary gesture of surrender, almost without realizing what he was doing.
§ 14.83
, , .
Now that the affair had spilled into his jurisdiction, the police commissioner took charge of operations.
§ 14.84
— , , …
“Go up to his room,” he told Célestin, “and bring me everything you find there…”
§ 14.85
, .
“If there are any devices that seem dangerous to you, don’t touch them.”
§ 14.86
.
“We’ll alert the firefighters in Belfort.”
§ 14.87
, , , , , …
Meanwhile, in a speech so confused and rambling that it sounded as though it had come from a four-year-old child, the master of the house was trying to explain how this servant had turned up without papers or luggage, accompanied by a governess…
§ 14.88
— , , ?
“By the way, where is she, this governess?”
§ 14.89
, .
They recognized Catherine, huddled against the sacred wood of the piano.
§ 14.90
, .
Using a revolver as a pointing finger, they directed her toward the corner where Mr. Planchet was being kept under guard.
§ 14.91
, .
Meanwhile, Célestin had returned with Planchet’s clothes.
§ 14.92
, , .
The police commissioner immediately proceeded to take an inventory.
§ 14.93
, , , , .
From a trouser pocket he took a clean but crumpled handkerchief, a bunch of keys, probably false ones, and a leaf of genuine lettuce whose purpose no one could fathom.
§ 14.94
.
There was nothing in the waistcoat pockets.
§ 14.95
, …
In the left inside pocket of the morning coat, an admission card for the casino at Bront-les-Eaux…
§ 14.96
, , …
In the other pocket, finally, an unopened letter…
§ 14.97
— ? .
“An unopened letter?” said the commissioner.
§ 14.98
— ? , , , .
“An unopened letter?” echoed Mr. Planchet, who had no idea that such a letter existed. His concierge had slipped it into a pocket he never used while he was asleep.
§ 14.99
— ? .
“Would you allow me to read it?” he asked the commissioner.
§ 14.100
— .
“It belongs to you.”
§ 14.101
, .
“Open it, but you must hand it back to me afterward.”
§ 14.102
.
Planchet opened the letter.
§ 14.103
: , .
He began by reading the letterhead: Office of Maître Girardinon, Notary in Paris.
§ 14.104
, …
He was seen reading on, his eyes widening and his breathing growing more and more labored…
§ 14.105
.
He handed the letter to the commissioner, who read it in a low voice.
§ 14.106
— .
“You are informed that your uncle in Montevideo has died and that you have inherited two million piastres.”
§ 14.107
, , , , , , , , …
Suddenly beside himself with excitement, Mr. Planchet recounted in a breathless rush, though in rather jumbled order, his trip to Bront, his loss at the boule game, the sleeping drug, his refuge in the garage, and his departure while unconscious beneath the blankets…
§ 14.108
— , , , .
“That is a tall tale if ever I heard one,” said the commissioner, appealing to one of the guests, Mr. Tholozène, professor of philosophy at the Faculty of Besançon, as a witness.
§ 14.109
, …
Fortunately, Mr. Tholozène was no prosaic, conventional thinker…
§ 14.110
— , , , .
“There are plenty of cases,” he said, “in which I believe the unbelievable more readily than the believable, for the simple reason that the believable is easier to invent.”
§ 14.111
, , …
Mr. Planchet himself proposed that they lock him in one of the rooms of the château, preferably with something to eat, since the servants’ meal had not yet begun…
§ 14.112
, .
Meanwhile, these gentlemen would be free to investigate his story.
§ 14.113
.
He asked only that they be good enough to use the telegraph and the telephone.
§ 14.114
— , .
“I understand that you want to verify what I am telling you before closing the case.”
§ 14.115
, …
“In the meantime, allow me to invite you to my wedding to Catherine in three weeks…”
§ 14.116
? .
“Catherine what?” he asked his fiancée.
§ 14.117
, , , …
She was so flustered, moved, and grateful that she could no longer recall her own surname…
§ 14.118
— … , …
“…Frépillot,” said Célestin irritably…